Sophie Benshitta Maven
5 min readJun 9, 2018


Did you get stuck, ontologically, at a 3-year old’s level, and you are still behaving like a 3-year old child

Ontology is being science.

It looks at the grounds of your being. Here are a few examples: “I am an object in the world of objects.” “I am not free to be myself!” “There is something wrong and it needs to be fixed!” “Don’t tell me what to do!” “I already know!” “It’s mine!” “I am a girl” “I am not loved” “Life is dangerous” “I can’t count on anyone” “I am worthless”See footnote 1

Your life is built on the grounds of your being… like a house. You don’t like your life? Examine your grounds of being: the issue is there.

My main complaint about my customers and students is this: they act like 3-year olds that know better. They know everything better.See footnote 2

I am watching Marcella, a British cop series second season. Netflix. I can’t stand it…

Like always, like almost everywhere in life, people who do work by the book (memes, from the mind, of course) are people who are in charge of you, me, our health, our safety, our future.

They are our bosses, our clients, our spouses… most likely.

People who live in the mind and profess to know are 98% of the population…

And they spend their entire lifetime trapped in Plato’s Cave, giving orders, executing orders, or make up their own stuff without any real and personal knowledge, just because they can.

They cannot tell if a suggestion, a recommendation, an advice is worth a damn, so they will be improvising, and mix in their own good ideas.

All crap.

When you don’t know who is worth listening to, then you’ll have democratic listening… It sounds good, they are so nice!, they must know, they have a PhD, or a doctorate, or a Nobel Prize… or they are a millionaire, billionaire, or the president of the United States. None of them are a sign that they actually know, that their truth value is high.

When push comes to shove, you’ll always choose the wrong steps, and you’ll always listen to the wrong people. Predictable, I can bet on it.

Even if you are my client.

If I needed you to succeed I would be in serious trouble… because what I have to say, what I recommend, what I ask you to do will have nothing to do with what you’ll do. You’ll do your own thing and you’ll lie about it too.

100% of the time.

When a child is about three years old, their ego is the largest compared to their available skills, knowledge, and foresight.

And unless by some chance of luck they find out, at that age, that they don’t know everything, they will remain the same… taking their own counsel, even if they know nothing.

The independent streak, don’t tell me what to do! I already know! Not even listening.

And nothing and no one told them that the surest way to be OK in life is to make less mistakes than the miserable majority.

Mistakes are expensive. You learn from them, but they can kill you. Intelligent people learn from other people’s mistakes!

Experimenting, in reality and thought experiments are often available to those who know that they are mistake-prone… which should be everybody.

When you know you are mistake-prone you use whatever is available to you to make better decisions, to make better choices, to get better advice… especially better than your own.

People who know that they are mistake-prone study the mistakes of others. They wear a belt and a suspender so they don’t end up with their pants at their ankle at the worst possible moment.

And tread lightly.

Not you… sorry to say. At least not those of you I know.

Because learning from other people’s mistakes, learning who is worth listening to, requires your humility to be high… and yours, most of your humility stayed at your three-year old level… none. None at all. Not even a 1 or a scale of 1–100.

The reason you live in your mind, the REASON, is because you think you have there everything you need.

Arrogance, lack of humility.

Even billionaires live in their minds, to some degree. Charlie Munger: 20%, Warren Buffet: 7%, Bill Gates: 10%.

Elon Musk: 10%, Jeff Bezos: 5%, You: 90% plus.

One of the measures of your humility is the number of books you read. Is it less than one book a week? You are arrogant.

Another measure is how many mentors you have. A mentor is a teacher who is invested in your success. If they don’t know you, they are not a mentor…

Yet another measure is how many paid coaching relationships you have. A coach is also invested in your success. They know you, they guide you.

None? You are arrogant.

Start with reading. Learn the mechanics of reading. Oh, you know how to read? Maybe not! Maybe the way you read keeps you arrogant and ignorant.

You don’t read? Ugh.

I teach a method of reading that is new, serves many purposes, and is life-altering.

It practices your elusive capacity to direct your attention. You are an insomniac? Undisciplined? Inconsistent? Unhappy? You have no clue how to operate your attention.

It effectively brings you out of the mind so what you read can find a place to adhere.
It widens your cone of vision.
Depending on what else you do in your life: it can make you a winner who sees mistakes before they make them… so they can stop.

It’s simple. Deceptively simple.

But the 3-year old won’t like it. Because it is humbling. And the 3-year old doesn’t like to learn that they don’t know everything, that the world is not about them.

I priced it silly cheap, so you can even waste that money only to discover that you are still three years old.

It will either wake you up, or not.


  1. Just like soil, your beingness is layered… rock, limestones, sand, etc… Nothing is as simple as that. And nevertheless all troubles come from your deepest grounds of being.
  2. I got stuck at 2-year old… maybe this is why I am so different. Not better, different. Different challenges, different issues.

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Sophie Benshitta Maven

Publish at Raise your vibration true empath, coach, publisher, mad scientist, living a life that is worth living