I Can’t Be Happy Unless… How to get out of your own way?

Here is another example for the unless (or-ness)… the distinction I’ve been trying to teach you, so far quite unsuccessfully. Why? Because it is really simple, but is really hard… and I am not quite able to express myself clearly yet… I am getting there, I promise.

Here is the article from 2011.

I caught myself, red handed, up to my chin in misery, wallowing… yuck.

I had been depressed for two straight days. It wasn’t someone else’s feeling, it was mine. It sucked. I mean, literally, it sucked me dry, took away my aliveness…

Yesterday I regretted that last week when I had a chance to get off the planet I didn’t go. Today I started to contemplate jumping off from some high place…

At five I was repeating in my head: right behind this darkness is the light, waiting for me to call the bluff… “What bluff? My life is over, no one wants what I have to offer, and therefore my life is wasted.” Said my mind, and it all sounded noble.

Noble and miserable. I felt personally offended. Hm. This is familiar! I used to chuckle at that phrase… Just can’t remember what was…